Home fitness test

Now I know why I am fat. It's because I don't do housework. How do I know? Because today I did housework. Laundry, dusting, floors, and worst of all I'm trying to hang curtains.

First there is an extended period of preparation to overcome house inertia. Then, I do just a little and I have to rest. There is more resting than working, yet my body aches and I feel exhausted.

Part of it is psychological strain. I have a carefully cultivated state of learned helplessness. You would never imagine that this is the same person who used to do regular car tuneups and even a brake job (one time only). I have an electric drill. I even bought it myself years ago, pre-neurosis. I've used the drill to make holes to hang pictures. But I don't really know where the brackets should be hung for curtains -- how far above the top of the window, how far outside.

I hate guessing; it makes me sweat and swoon. Finally I just leaped blindly and marked spots for drilling. I should have drilled before I went for screws, but, what can I say, I didn't. So I didn't know for sure whether there was wood behind the drywall. I drove to to Ace Hardware to find out what kind of screws to buy. (Yes, I took the bracket with me. Genius!) I bought for both wood and no wood to cover my bases. Still I had to take them all back because the screws were too long. The drill hit hard stuff, the block wall of the house no doubt.

Brackets up, I turned to the curtains I'd bought at IKEA. I would have to custom cut them to the desired length. Sticky tape was included for easy hemming. I was warned to allow for shrinkage of 4% (about 4"). Brilliant me, I decided to just go ahead and wash them first to get the shrinkage over with. They looked a lot better before washing and drying. Now they are wrinkled as hell and need extensive ironing. Shit.

The iron is hot, so back I go. Rest is over.